1 Bring the gift of comfort to others by taking time to listen.

This holiday season, anytime you enquire, “How are you?”, take the time to really listen. Listening to another is a true gift of comfort in our busy world.

2 Give yourself a comfort break.

During this bustling season, it’s vital to slow down. Take a leisurely walk in the park, quietly meander through a museum or sit for a spell in a café, sipping a warm beverage.

3 Find simple ways to create a holiday feeling at home.

A cozy and welcoming home brings the holiday spirit to those who live there and everyone who visits. Fill the house with the aroma of freshly baked cookies, the sound of cheerful relaxing music, or the presence of a vase of flowers or bowl of fresh fruit. 

4 Imagine a spirited thread connecting every human being.

Engaging with the web of life can provide endless joys. Rather than be tempted to consider others to be in our way, remember that we are the way. Expressing a kind and helpful spirit uplifts us all.

5 Receive the presence of another person’s tears.

Many emotions bubble up around the holidays. Accepting someone’s tears of regret or grief, without judgment or interruption, is a healing gift. Sometimes there’s nothing to figure out and no fix is needed; a shoulder on which to rain tears is sufficient.

6 Give a present of physical comfort and joy.

Make use of the five senses. Give gifts to touch, smell and taste: a soft sweater, lavender bubble bath, CD of favorite music, new journal, or flavored jar of honey.

7 Enjoy the ease of being with family.

When you gather with family, let the comfort of togetherness be stronger than any judgment or criticism. Walk over to a relative, sit down, and ease into a nourishing conversation, even it’s just about the weather or the food. 

8 Discover the joys of gratitude.

Express gratitude, one of the best gifts of all, throughout the day. Give a sincere “Thank you,” to those around you for their friendship or service; to a colleague for helping with a project; to your partner for packing your lunch; or to a child who brings you a holiday present she made in school.

9 Let everyday routines be a continual source of comfort.

During the holidays, it’s important to stay connected with everyday comforts. Enjoy the pleasure of that first sip of coffee or tea. Snuggle into bed at night with a good book. Take a warm and relaxing bath. Notice the simple, daily rituals that bring you contentment and joy.

10 Look for opportunities to help one another.

Be open and aware of others who may need a little encouragement or support during the holiday season. Call a friend to meet for coffee, offer a helping hand to someone in need, donate extra clothes or blankets to a homeless shelter, or spend an afternoon with kids making holiday cards.

The true spirit of the holiday season shows up and shines forth in both the giving and receiving.

Colette Lafia is the author of Comfort and Joy: Simple Ways to Care for Ourselves and Others. She has a San Francisco-based spiritual direction practice and trained with the Spiritual Directors’ Institute in Mercy Center, CA. Connect at ColetteLafia.com.